Interview

I interviewed for my "dream job" at the VA this afternoon, with the Polytrauma Team. It's a part-time position that serves returning veterans with multiple injuries, usually with TBI. Not like that's my passion or anything.

But why oh why are interviews always so awkward? Everything went well enough (it's not like they hired me on the spot, nor did they kick me out the door), but I still left feeling like, "did they like me?" "Will they call me?" "I shouldn't have said that thing about loving to work with people with mental health issues." "I should have spoken more about how I love to learn, and that I work well as part of a team but can also function very autonomously." "Should I email them and tell them that when I say thanks for the interview?"

I've been obsessing all day about the 'omissions and commissions' of the interview, as my dad would say. And then, in a moment of over-confidence, I think, "What if they offer me the job? Am I sure I want to work? This would be a big-girl job, like, forever. Can I handle that? What about in the summers when Alex is off work? Will I get along well with the rest of the team? Will I like them???"

In "prepping" for the interview a few days prior, we had a mock trial with the Bean during dinnertime. Needless to say, she didn't get the job, because it went a little something like this.

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Tell me about yourself.
"Well, I was born in March. I have small eyes. I like to giggle. I enjoy clapping my fists together, and also like banging toys on the table. And I recently discovered my voice - it can get really good and loud."

What are your strengths?
"For starters, I can put my whole fist in my mouth. I'm a really good eater. And I can tell you when I want another bite - which I always do, I always want another bite - by squawking at you. I'm good at getting other people's attention. Even the old lady a few rows over in another line at the grocery store. I have strong communication skills - if you blow raspberries at me, I can blow them right back. Or if you make a fake cough ("I've got the black lung, pop"), I'll do it too. Most importantly, I'm cute. Maybe the cutest. At least, that's what Daddy and the Milk Lady tell me. They say, "How'd you get so cute?!? You are the cutest baby I've ever seen!" So I must be really, really good looking."

What about your weaknesses?
"Hmm, I can't talk. And that kind of sucks. Or walk. Or even crawl, but I'm working on that. Or wipe my own ass. Or feed myself. So really, I need a lot of help doing your basic day-to-day stuff. But this is all casts me in sort of a negative light. Think about the things I just told you. Like about me being cute."

Tell me about a time you encountered a very difficult challenge but were able to overcome.
"Oh, let me tell you about the time I traveled through the birth canal! Woowee, that was a challenge. But I did it, and I did it in record time. I was put through the ringer, so to speak, and I think the fact that I made it, without much help from anyone else, and when I finished I didn't even cry about it, I think that shows my character, right there."

How do you handle stress or pressure?
"Well usually I just take a nap. That works well for me. I figure everyone needs some time to cool off, and I like to re-charge with a nap. Or maybe I bang my blocks together. That sometimes help to take the edge off, too. But in general, I don't get too worked up about stuff. Unless I'm hungry. Or if I'm tired. Or if I want to hold the leash when we walk the dog. And sometimes if I see an old, scary-looking man. But that nap can solve at least one of those problems."
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Sometimes my husband knows just how to tickle my funny bone ... xoxo