Little Dog in a Big CIty

I now fully understand the meaning of "getting the shit scared out of you." No, not by personal experience, per say, but because of my fraidy-cat new doggie. The poor little bean pooped herself not once but twice! The first time, I'm giving her a get-out-of-jail-free-card. It was her first night at our place, and she was to freaked to go up the stairs so I carried her. Guess she didn't like that. And yesterday? Well yesterday, (as I looked like a street-kid dressed in a baggie hooded sweatshirt sitting outside the fancy liquor store waiting for my husband to get his boutique whiskey or whatever) a long-haired skateboarder launched out the store door, dropping his skateboard in a fit of "bam" and rode off, each groove in the cement making vibrating the sidewalk. Gizmo nearly shit herself right there, but instead let 'er rip during the series of the next FIVE long-haired skater dudes who did the same thing. It's amazing how much noisier the world is when you're trying to consider the needs of a traumatized little pup. Alex and I decided we should write a children's book with sound effects about Gizmo being afraid. OF EVERYTHING. Our storybook would go a little something like this ...

A Little Dog in a Big City (said slowly, exaggerating each sound with excitement)

There once was a little dog. Her name was Gizmo. She was 2 years old (that's 14 in dog years).

She had lived her whole life in the country. And then some people wanted to give her a new home. In the city! She thought the city was just too loud. And it scared her.

"This city is very, very noisy," she thought, concerned.

First, there are all the cars driving by. "VROOM."

And those cars have horns that get honked. "BEEP."

And there are the people. So. Many. People. "CHITTER CHATTER."

And there are trains that drive through. "CHOO CHOO."

There are the kids playing in the parks. "CHILDREN'S LAUGHTER."

There are sounds of people eating. "CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH."

And dogs barking. "WOOF WOOF."

There are cell phones ringing. "BRRRRING."

And people eating. "CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH."

And bicycle bells dinging. "DING DING."

And people singing. "FA LA LA LA LA."

And then there is me. I don't make a peep!