June Gloom

I blame the weather. But maybe it's just me.

I've had this two-week funk that I can't seem to kick. So here's a list of Things That Will Make Me Feel Better. My, husband, on the other hand, calls most of these "bad ideas." What. Ever.

1. Buying a dog. Wouldn't I benefit from the responsibility?

2. Getting a new tattoo. I just got two feathers on my left forearm last weekend, and now I'm ready to finish up the bicep/tricep area with a magnolia branch or something.

3. Conceiving. Who wouldn't want a little Closeman running around? Alex is so cute now, and he was even more adorable as a little bow-legged, cowboy-loving munchkin. I want one of my own.

4. Going to Cuba. Latin lovers aside, I've always wanted to visit the forbidden country.

5. Weighing 115 pounds. At least all my clothes would fit again.

6. A new camera. The expensive, professional kind. So in case I leave the house, I have something to document my re-integration back into society.

7. Watching every episode of Army Wives. On the computer. In one sitting. With bon-bons on my lap.

8. Eating brown sugar mixed with cream cheese. Chased with s'more flavored ice cream.

9. Shopping online. I don't have to change my clothes to buy new ones.



And here's a list of Things I SHOULD Do To Feel Better:

1. Actually go to a yoga class. Stop just packing the bag, bringing the mat, and planning to go. But actually GO.

2. Cook dinner. With so much free time on my hands, wouldn't it be the nice thing to do for my hubby?

3. Clean the house. For god's sake, we've lived here more than two months now.

4. Go for a bike ride. Or a run. Or even a walk. Get some exercise, fatass.

5. Calculate our finances and budget for the month of June. No more cushion to overspend.

6. Work on completing my half-finished projects. Hem jeans. Sew patches on pants. Knit the scarf. Make the pouches. Write thank-you cards. Paint the chairs. Paint the ladder. Go through school stuff.

7. Do the laundry. And wash the sheets. It's just gross.

8. Phone a friend. Remember how I used to have those? I used to nurture relationships, and it's time to do so again. At least if I want anyone to speak highly of me at my funeral.

9. Oh yeah, did I mention getting some exercise? Seriously, people. I KNOW it will make me feel better, but I'd rather be glued to this same spot on my couch. The spot that's sunken below the rest of the couch. The spot where the fabric is softer than the rest of the couch because the bed sores on my ass have eroded it.

10. Go to the grocery store. Stop eating popcorn and cookies and calling it a meal. Spinach made Popeye strong, so it's worth a shot.